Today’s Goulash: Wednesday 11/24

Almost Thanksgiving so this pot of goulash is heavy on the turkeys (feathered and human). Might be a few ingredients you don’t care for, feel free to push them to the side. Ingredients include: natural and artificial ingredients – consume at your own risk. All served with a side of sarcasm. Remember people I don't make this stuff up.

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Give Thanks For The Animals

PETA Asks Church To Give Up Turkey Dinner
"Let the needy eat tofu"
{I know who the real turkeys are in this story}

PETA campaign pitches fish as smart, sensitive
"Fish are friends, not food"
{next they will protest the mass murder of mosquitoes and termites}

Dog Who Longed for Puppies Nurses Kittens

Disabled Dolphin Swimming On Bridgestone Rubber
{man-made fin allows dolphin to swim with the rest of them}

Dolphins Saved Us From Shark, Lifeguards Say
{one good turn deserves another (see link above)}

National Geographic Channel Finds Hogzilla
{the world still waits to know if Hogzilla was a true monster}

Farmer's Hog Tops Scales at 1,600-Pounds
{but is he as big as Hogzilla?}

Tiger and pig (photo)
{The wolf will live with the lamb, and the leopard will lie down with the young goat; The calf, the young lion, and the fattened calf together; and a little child will lead them.}

Camera catches mice in the act
{Tiny fish is threatened by wanton destruction, PETA remains silent}

Here is what whitebait look like

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Saints and Sinners

'Return the baby and we'll give you the beer'
South Australian Brewing Company offers a unique reward for the safe return of baby Jesus statue
{this could backfire and trigger a lot of copy-cat thefts}

St. Louis Admits Mistaken Crime Data
{maybe the local brewery should offer free beer…then again maybe the officials were drinking the beer while they produced the report}

Norwegian Senior Roughs Up Purse Snatcher
{pick on someone your own age punk, its safer}

Truck Drops Modular Home on Vt. Interstate
{gives a whole new meaning to 'mobile' home}

They Don't Come Any Dumber...
{if the patrons enjoyed the show then management should hire them for a nightly act}

Woman Claims Drug Dealer Ripped Her Off
{why do you think they call it dope}

Woman in critical condition after stolen turkey is hurled at her car, 6 teens arrested.
The Hurler's defense "I'm nearly blind"
{wait till the PETA goons get hold of them}
- -Here is an update on the woman's recovery

Vermont Police Hunt Down Cheese Saboteur
{maybe it was PETA people protesting the use of milk}

18 Cat Skeletons Found in Couple's Bedroom
{where are the PETA people when you really need them}

Stingers Get Stung
TV crew doing a story of "lax security" at the Jacksonville Port are caught in the act by the Coast Guard, face fines of $32,500 each for violating security zone
{guess the story will be changed to how good the security is at the port}